there you are naked, alone, and boom!
I fell as soon as I stepped into the bathtub at the house in Albuquerque this weekend. my hip bounced off the edge as I grabbed for the shower curtain that then collapsed on top of me. at least it kept me from getting wet.
“that’s it,” I thought, “I broke my hip.” is there a more geriatric thought to have?!
when my partner ran in to turn off the water and lift me out of the tub, I cautiously put weight on it. it stung but it seemed okay. I’ve broken plenty of bones: it didn’t seem like that.
I still burst into tears: it wasn’t from the pain of the injury but the worry that I may have hurt myself worse than I felt right then. we’d have to figure out a hospital. in Albuquerque. medical transport home. doctors visits, and treatments, and a long recovery time. yet another injury with long term consequences for my mobility.
I spent the afternoon icing and took extra anxiety medication. in time, it was clear that my shock had worn off but my pain wasn’t getting worse.
the bruise began to bloom the following day. but I could walk and sit without pain: a blessing for someone who wanted to enjoy the rest of her trip and then needed sit on an airplane for 2 hours.
I feel exceptionally fortunate. after my recent fractures, I expect to break something every time I fall. and I fall a lot. there’s nothing wrong with me, I’m just a klutz.
it feels silly that I’ve tumbled on icy slopes snowboarding, slid down a steep hiking trail in Yosemite, but every time I get seriously hurt I’m doing something mundane like taking a walk in my local park. or taking a shower, I guess.
the day before, a Friday, we snuck out for a special Friday lunch. we ate incredible food in the sunshine, wandered a biodynamic farm, greeted a cranky sheep and beautiful chickens.
“I’m so glad we did that,” I thought after I fell. “It would have been so dumb if I were actually hurt and spent the previous day just… working.”
maybe that’s the more appropriate middle-aged thought: enjoy the world, because accidents and illness may claim your ability to do that anytime. to some that’s morbid, but it’s a good reminder for me to prioritize the special spontaneous moments.
but for now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m gonna go put on some comfy pants and see what I can do about that bruise.
